the love of my life
has messy brown hair
only wears dark colors
treats me like his boys
and drinks me under the table

but tonight i’m also a mother, bloated with booze
offering to request Ubers,
telling my girls he/she/they ain’t shit, complimenting
bust lines and glittery eyeshadow
praying we all make it home tonight

did i mention i’m pissed tonight?
i’m bejeweled in discount jewelry
push up bras and shapewear digging into me
like claws
when will they finally notice me?
all this effort for nothing

i’m laughing too loud in the lounge but
i know i’ll be crying in the bathroom tonight
because i know i ain’t shit to anyone

except it’s saturday on Iturbide Street

and everyone loves me even if
they don’t know me, even if it’s only for
tonight and only in this bar

tonight
everyone is the love of my life:
the beautiful boys and girls and
the queens and the queers
the drunks in the parking lots
the lovers in cars with tinted windows
beggars and strays pleading for scraps
and i don’t have much to give

but tonight i hope the love we can’t find
anywhere else will keep us full
until next time.